I can't believe I have neglected to update this
story, which left off when one of my parishioners left a copy of the
It Gets Better Project book outside my office and I set it out in our reading nook. See also the
earlier posts in this
series to hear how I came to receive the book and the support of
Lutheran Church of the Savior in this work.
Not a week after setting the book out, we were hosting a luncheon after a funeral. After eating and visiting with folks, I had gone to my office. When I returned to the luncheon, I found a grandson of the deceased standing in the reading nook, reading the It Gets Better book. When I approached, he quickly returned the book to the shelf, but I picked it up and told him how great and powerful I thought the book was, and asked him what he thought of it. He said he had no idea IGBP had a book version, and that he was surprised to find it on display in a church building.
He had been removed from his youth leadership position in his former Baptist church when he had come out, he said, and had not found a church that wanted a 17-year-old gay kid around. I told him such churches exist; this is one, and there are many others. I told him about my dream of having the IGBP book in churches to parallel the drive to have it in school libraries, as church is another frequent setting for the bullying of gay teens. He told me he wanted to go to college for design, or something similarly awesome, hopefully in New York City. It was a great conversation, one of the most meaningful (for me, at least) I have had as a pastor.
I have not seen him again, and I don't even remember his name, but the joy I find in this memory is not about hoping to make him a member of my church. As great as that would be, I am content knowing that we were able to make this gay teen feel welcome in his time of grief. After his previous experience with church, all too common for LGBT folks of every age, he had every reason to be apprehensive about coming into a Christian church building, even for his grandmother's funeral. I am deeply glad we were able to make him feel as welcome as the rest of his family on that significant day.